Wow, oh my god, wow

I rarely watch Wife Swap. However I just got home and I’m eating and just wanted something on the TV right while I ate.

One of the families is your normal kind of suburban crazy, the other, and I am not kidding, is a family of pirates. A mother, father, two daughters and a son. They don’t work (that I can see but I missed the first 25 min), they don’t clean, they don’t throw anything away, they have fleas all over their dog and house, and don’t seem to mind. Of course they dress like pirates, talk like pirates (albeit cartoon pirates) and embrace “piratitude” a life, philosophy and attitude.

There was a lot of bizarre shit on this show and I’m too tired to write it all down but the best was when the time came for the wives to make their changes. Neither was successful and both families were ready for a mutiny (sorry, I had to say it). So, for the first time in Wife Swap history (or so they said) the wives were allowed to call for back-up. The suburban wife called on her sister, the pirate wife called on Captain Slappy.

Captain Slappy was as round as he was tall and was a caricature of a pirate, if that is even possible. I really wanted to find a photo of Captain Slappy, sadly all of the full body shots that I found paled in comparison to his TV appearance attire, so the headshot will have to do, it at least has the hat. I also found that Cap’n Slappy and the pirate husband have a website etc, if you would like to talk like a pirate tomorrow check it out as tomorrow (September 19th) is Talk Like A Pirate Day.

And, if you think Ren Faires are scary check out the photo page and keep an eye of for the "pirate wedding". Actually, now that I think about it, I'm sure they LOVE the Ren Faires.