Oscar I

The following is a long rambling commentary I kept while watching the 78th Annual Academy Awards.

But, just in case you don't care and/or don't want to read it all, I will recap.

Mr. Stewart was funny, and a few times hilarious, but I doubt he will be back. The show, on the whole, was very middle of the road, and average. No amazing and wonderful gowns and no really ridiculous or horrible ones either. There was nothing terribly shocking and no crazy speeches to focus on.

Now for the tedious version.

Awww, Jon Stewart, you are so cute! Especially in bed with George Clooney. The opening sketch was humorous, not laugh out loud funny, but I smiled a little.

Hm, Charlize Theron is not looking too interested or entertained and who let Keira Knightley sit next to Jack Nicholson? That could be far too tempting for him, and I am desperately hoping the young lady next to him is his daughter.





















And now for the Jew jokes...you knew there would be a Jew joke when Jon addressed Steven Spielberg.

Um, in addition to Charlize looking un-ammused, may I ask what the hell she is wearing? That bow is bigger than her head and exactly what color is she? Is she here as an Oscar nominee or a contestant in Ms. Overly Tan 2006?






















Hey Nic, did you not have time to finish your hair? I’m glad it at least attempts to cover your enormous unmoving forehead, but the right side looks like you took a nap on it.

Paul Giamatti, am I am I the only one who can’t stand your voice? I think I am. The more I think about you and your voice the I hate it and can't listen to you at all. And, now that he pointed out his resemblance to Rob Schneider I can't stop thinking he is does have a strong resemblance. Sad for both of them really.

Good for you George, addressing the titles (sexiest man, Oscar winner) and the predictions of who wins what and what it means…

HEY…why are they starting to play music right away, and why is it STILL playing…is this their new ploy to make the speeches shorter? God, it is just distracting and annoying. REALLY ANNOYING, and I can't imagine how annoying it is for the speaker. It is like the last two minutes of Statuary Night Live when the host is on the stage with everyone and the sappy music plays and they all hug and mouth happy birthdays and ‘hi’ to various people.